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SafeNest Safety Plan

Whether you’re ready to leave or not, it’s important to prepare a safety plan and review it often. Learn how to make one to keep you and your loved ones safe.

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What is a Safety Plan?

If you are considering leaving your home, it is important to prepare a safety plan. A safety plan is a personalized, practical plan that includes ways to remain safe while still in, planning to leave or after leaving an abusive relationship. SafeNest has a list of options for consideration as you prepare to get out of danger, stay safe and plan for your future. We can also help you develop a plan, call the 24/7 Domestic Violence Hotline for assistance.

Packing your Go Bag

If possible, pack a bag of important items or things you use every day. Stash this bag in a safe place that you can access if you have to leave immediately and unexpectedly.
Items to Take, if Possible

  • Children (if it is safe)
  • Money
  • Keys to car, house, work
  • Extra clothes
  • Medicine
  • Important papers for you and your children
  • Birth certificates
  • Social security cards
  • School and medical records
  • Bankbooks, credit cards
  • Driver’s license
  • Car registration
  • Welfare identification
  • Passports, green cards, work permits
  • Lease/rental agreement
  • Mortgage payment book, unpaid bills
  • Insurance papers
  • PPO, divorce papers, custody orders
  • Address book
  • Pictures, jewelry, things that mean a lot to you
  • Items for your children (toys, blankets, etc.)

  • Have important phone numbers

    Keep a written/typed list of important numbers, like SafeNest, and friends or family in a safe place in the event you are unable to take your cell phone.

  • If you have children

    Teach your kids how to dial 9-1-1.

  • Make up a code word

    Make up a code word or phrase you can use with friends or neighbors you feel comfortable discussing your abuse with. If they hear you yell or say the word, they will call 9-1-1.

  • How to get out of your home safely

    Practice ways to get out and include your children as well.

  • Find safer places in your home

    Familiarize yourself on your home’s exits or rooms with no weapons. If you feel abuse is going to happen try to get your abuser to one of these safer places.

  • Think of where you could go

    Even if you are not currently planning to leave, think of places where you could go and how you would leave. Try doing things that get you out of the house like taking out the trash, walking the pet or going to the store. Put together a bag of things you use every day (see the checklist below) and hide it in an easy to access location.

  • Review your safety plan often

    Once you’ve created your plan, review it often. You want to be familiar enough to enact it in a stressful or scary situation.

  • Who can help you

    Write a mental list of people who would be able to help you if you left.

  • Learn how to delete your browser history or and emails

    If you are researching how to leave or emailing people to tell them you are thinking of leaving, learn how to delete your browser history and emails.

  • Make sure you can call for help

    Keep change on you for phone calls or consider getting a cell phone.

  • Opening a bank account

    Opening a bank account in your name only or getting a credit card in your name will allow you to have separate finances.

  • Practice how you would leave

    Try doing things that will get you out of the house, like taking out the trash, walking the family pet, or going to the store. Practice how you would leave so you’re familiar with your plan.

  • How you can take your children with you safely

    There are times when taking your children with you may put all your lives in danger. You need to protect yourself to be able to protect your children.

  • How to take your pet with you safely

    If you have pets that you are unwilling to leave, think about how you could safely get out of the house with them. This could be a trip to the dog park, a walk, or a vet appointment.

  • Packing a bag of things

    Put together a bag of things you need or use every day. Hide it in a place where it would be easy for you to access.

  • Take photos of important documents

    Take photos of important documents if you can’t make copies or take them with you.

  • Be vigilant

    Now is the most dangerous time, and abuse may escalate.

  • Get a cellphone

    Share your new contact information only with people you trust.

  • Getting a Temporary Protective Order

    Always keep a copy with you and give a copy to the people who take care of your children (including their schools and your boss). A picture of the abuser may help them recognize the person if they attempt contact.

  • Change the locks

    If possible, change the locks immediately.

  • Update your friends and neighbors

    Tell friends and neighbors that your abuser no longer lives with you. Ask them to call the police if they see your abuser near your home or children, or anywhere else.

  • Share your protection order

    Give your children’s caregivers a list of the people who are allowed to pick them up. If you have a protection order, give copies to their teachers, school administrators and babysitters.

  • Don’t go to the same places you used to

    Change your routines, and refrain from using the same stores or businesses that you did when you were with your abuser.

  • For visitation purposes, do the exchange in a public place

    If you must speak with your abuser for visitation purposes, do the exchange in a public place; even at a police substation.